There is a difference between gender identity and gender expression. Gender identity is how someone chooses to identify their gender, whilst gender expression is how they choose to express it. For example, I am nonbinary (this is my gender identity), and I choose to present in a more masculine way (and this is my gender expression). I wanted to write this because all to often equate gender identity with gender expression, and this isn’t true – you can express your gender however you want.
This means that I feel more comfortable wearing typically more masculine clothing – such as button ups or jeans. Despite this, I am still a transmasculine nonbinary person if I choose to wear a dress or skirt, and my pronouns are still currently he / they. This is because gender identity = gender expression.
This doesn’t just apply to trans and nonbinary people – but also to cisgender people (those whose gender identity matches their biological sex). You can still be a cisgender man and wear a dress, and vise versa. But I want to focus on trans and nonbinary individuals because to some extent, we are held to higher standards. Trans men are expected to hypermasculine, trans women are expected to to hyper feminine, and nonbinary folks are expected to be androgynous 100% of the time. But this isn’t true, for a number of factors. More serious factors include safety or fear of rejection, while less serious factors may be due to choice or convenience. But no matter what your situation, I want you to know that no matter how you express your gender, it valid – you are not harming anyone.
Now I do understand that gender expression, to some extent, equate to your gender identity. This is because typically gendered clothes may give you more euphoria than dysphoria, and thats also valid. I can 100% understand why someone would want to dress in a binary way – it may validate them more, meaning that they will have a more confirmed sense of their gender identity. And that’s OK. I just wanted to say that there is no wrong way to present your gender, and no to people will present their gender the same.
How you present your gender is your choice, and no one can take that away from you.